Saturday, February 4, 2012

Can I pursue my dreams despite my fears?

What a great question....
I think this question is the one that precedes our dreams. It is for me anyway. I have many dreams that I am just now discovering exist deep inside myself. They are constantly in the back of my mind. They are things I believe I am meant to do in life; part of my purpose. They are pretty clear in description. Yet I try to ignore them. Why, you ask? Simple....fear. What kind?
Most of us have this fear in common, though we mask it so no one can see our vulnerability and weakness. Isn't it just easier to not try at all, than to try and fail? With that ending, it would seem that effort was a waste of time to not produce a desired result. But there was still a result, just not the one we wanted. It's still growth and allows us to move forward. I'm at the point in my life where I'm tired of standing still and just coasting day to day. Afraid to try new things for fear of the unknown. You all know by now, that though I have many dreams that I would love to pursue, my biggest one is writing. To be a writer. I've had so much positive feedback and encouragent, both from people I do and don't know. Yet, I'm scared. Me? A writer? I've never been to any fancy schools and I don't have any special knowledge and skills that could possibly come close to measuring up to all the brilliant writers in this world. The odds are stacked up against me everywhere I see. All I have going for me is my natural talent that I was born with. God-given talent. Is it enough? Is what I have to say from my little corner of the world important enough for people to listen to? Would people want to?
I guess I should be firm in expressing my desired outcome. To become a writer to me is not to become famous. It's not to make lots and lots of money. It's using words in a magical way to connect with another person. To bring someone on a journey in their mind through words in different forms. For me it would be a form of encouragement, to touch someone's life; to make a difference. Words are so powerful, people. They can completely change lives when put together in positive form. I want to make a contribution to the world. To give back. What I'm doing now in my life is just simply not enough for me and I won't settle for standing still. I want to challenge myself. The problem is, I can't seem to follow through with it. But if I don't try, I'll never know, and I'll always wonder. There's always room for growth of a person since perfection is unattainable; and I'm due for a growth spurt. 
I guess I just wanted to share my thoughts with you. Everyone has fears. But you'd never know with the show we all put on. Put on our warrior faces when we step out the door and make sure no one sees anything but strength. I understand that we live in a time where that's necessary for survival. But, make sure you have some kind of outlet for the fears and pain and weakness in your life. Because when kept locked up, it eats away at you and turns into anger which leads to hate, and we can all agree there is far too much of that in our world.


  1. Lovely post Alaina! Keep writing, we all enjoy reading what you have to say! Love you friend!

  2. AMAZING!!! This is so true. You just spoke to my soul girl. I also aspire to be a writer, and in this day and time with all of the self publishing options, there's really nothing holding us back. Dig down deep and take it one day at a time. I am sure our father has great things is store for you.