Monday, May 3, 2010

Conflict with Prayer

I have continuously struggled with this area in my relationship with God. I think I tend to go through the motions and say what sounds good, but not really open up my heart. I tend to put God in a box, forgetting His incredible power and omniscience. I limit His capabilities, what He is able to do. All the stresses in my life I take on myself, not trusting in Him to handle it. "I'll do it myself, my own way." It never works by the way. I am not strong enough to bear these things and I have no idea how to make it better. Even though I try to find the answers myself, I know deep down that the answers lie with God. I am thankful for the Holy Spirit that continues to whisper in my ear to go to God. I do ignore that voice, but I hear it. But, thick-headed as I am, continue to try over and over to find my own way.
Then I ask for forgiveness and bring it to the Lord and find relief quite quickly. It lasts for a few days and then the vicious cycle begins all over again.
Why do I continue to push Him away when I know He is the best thing for me and will provide the things that I need?Another thing about prayer...."I don't feel like praying, I don't want to". "I don't know what to say."

 I read this the other day in my devotional.....
"Day by Day" by Charles Swindoll

"Tell God all that is in your heart, as one unloads one's heart, its pleasures and its pain, to a dear friend. Tell Him your troubles, that He may comfort you; tell Him your joys, that He may sober them; tell Him your longings, that He may purify them; tell Him your dislikes, that He may help you to conquer them; talk to Him of your temptations, that He may shield you from them; show Him the wounds of your heart, that He may heal them; lay bare your indifference to good, your depraved tastes for evil, your instability. Tell Him how self-love makes you unjust to others, how vanity tempts you to be insincere, how pride disguises you to yourself and others. If you thus pour out all your weaknesses, needs, troubles, there will be no lack of what to say. You will never exhaust the subject. It is continually being renewed. People who have no secrets from each other never want for subject of conversation. They do not weigh their words, for there is nothing to be held back; neither do they seek for something to say. They talk out of the abundance of the heart, without consideration they say just what they think."


  1. Oh I know, Laina! It is such a struggle... but if we didn't struggle, we wouldn't need God.

    If we could exhaust our knowledge and the way He comforts us, we would stop going to Him forever, because we wouldn't NEED Him. May we always NEED Him.

    Give your burdens to the Lord. He Loves you right where you are at. You have not "lost" any of His love. His love is unconditional.

    Live to please Him. We were created for His glory and for HIS pleasure.

    Yes, it grieves Him when we choose not to disobey... but oh how His heart rejoices when we come to Him in repentance and are renewed.

    Just like your little precious little one, you will learn so much as you teach and train her.

    Sometimes I find myself telling Riley, "why can't you just obey the first time". Uggg

    How often do I obey the first time? sigh....

    Great post!

  2. Great post Laina, I too struggle with this. I think for me the worst is that I tend to think that to speak to the Lord I need to use these big words and have a really elaborate speech. How ridiculous, if only I could finally realize that I should speak to him like I am talking to a best friend.

    I'll get there some day.

  3. Well, Liana I want to say that I think there will by many who can relate to this post inluding me. This year my family has made a commitment to start seeking God more and It has been a bumpy but beautiful road. I know as time goes by it will get better as I continue on that path and I know it will for you too. Also, thank you so much for following my blog and for the lovely comment. I will be checking back with yours too.

  4. Hi Liana,
    I also struggle with this area in my life, as I know many others do too. As a stay at home mom of two busy young children I often forget that God is right there and wanting to help me. I try and start my day off in prayer, even if it is a small prayer like "Thank you for today" I find for myself if I start my day praying I have an easier time in bring God into my everyday activities. I have found it nice to have someone over three feet tall to talk to and God encourages me through my day. All that being said I don't always do this, I struggle every morning and have to make an effort to pray and keep praying because sometime I feel that God doesn't want to hear about how I am wondering about what to do with the kids, but He does because God loves me (and you) and wants to hear about all that we struggle with all that we are thankful for and everything in between. I want to encourage you as you seek out God everyday and as you grow closer to Him!! :)
    Thanks for following me. You have a wonderful blog and I look forward to visiting it.

  5. Sorry I mis-spelled your name.

  6. I absolutely love your blog:-)

  7. Great blog by the way. I am your new follower and would love for you to come by and visit my sit at http:/

  8. Hi! Stopping by from MBC. Love your blog.

    Have a nice day!

  9. Hi Laina,

    Thanks for sharing. I really needed to read this post today. I somtimes get so overwhelmed with my day to day life that I forget to slow down and be alone with Him.

    Thanks for commenting on my blog.

  10. I can totally relate to this. We had a sermon at church the other week about what it means to pray "Jesus' name" and my Hubby and I had a long conversation about where we feel we're falling short in prayer.

    We tend to list a bunch of wants, then tack "forgive all that's sinful, keep sin and evil far from us, we pray all this in Jesus' name, amen"

    We realized that we should focus more on thankfulness and asking for forgiveness and less on our friends'/family's/own needs and wants. Sometimes it seems like we're saying the right words, but we're not really reflecting on what we're saying.

    But do you think we've changed that at all?? Nope!

  11. How true, I know that being a new mama my spiritual life has taken a major backseat. And yet, This is the hardest, most challenging season my life has ever been through. Have been really convicted to get back into church and get plugged into some sort of small group to have those that will encourage and uplift.

    Thanks for the honesty !!

  12. This is such a great post! Very timely for me too...I often forget G-d's power.

  13. I am glad I am not alone. Thank you for your kind words of support :)So glad God doesn't demand perfection and that He knows we are going to fail but still loves us anyway :)

  14. Your honesty is refreshing and wonderful. We all struggle and God is so patient when we unknowingly ignore Him in our daily routine. "Lord, may I turn to You first, think of You often, see Your hand and give You my all." This is my prayer for today. Love you Lain!